Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Chapter Forty-Nine: It's The Not-Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown
We go to Starbucks a lot. Damian is certifiably addicted to caffeine, our tour manager Mike needs his decaf in the morning (?), Tim enjoys the soy chai, and Dan likes to play with the stuffed animals in the gift section. In case anyone from Starbucks corporate is reading this (and I know you are), I'd like to report my great disappointment in your pumpkin-spice flavored products. I'm a big fan of seasonal foods and beverages (cider, eggnog and green beer top the list), and, also of all things pumpkiny: ravioli, seeds, jack-o-lanterns, Billy Corgan, etc. Logic dictates that your pumpkin-spice latte and doughnut would cause me great happiness, but somehow it feels like I've been Linus VanPelted. These products are mediocre at best and sucktastic at worst. It's like the new Weezer record: I expected so much, and got so little. Please work on improvements for next Halloween. Also, you've totally got permission to start selling our album in your stores.

Love,
Rusty

28 Comments:

Anonymous Bec said...

indeed, those Pumpkin spice products can be deceiving.

2:44 PM  
Anonymous MB said...

he he he... I like to play the stuffed animals in the gift section too.

3:02 PM  
Blogger HannaBobanna said...

I know exaclty what you mean,Rusty.You should try the Pumpkin Spice Latte at 7-11. Yes, thats right,7-11. Its delicious, and full of that great pumpkin taste. Plus, its only like 99 cents. It doesnt get any better that that.

3:13 PM  
Blogger elizabertie said...

Oh, but it does, hannabobanna.......you've obviously not tried the pumpkin pancakes at IHOP. They maintain the roundness of the pumpkin or cup container of pumpkin latte, but conveniently smooshed the goodness into two dimentions.

And don't go fuckin' it all up with blueberry syrup. I tried that and it sucks.

3:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

that weezer comment hurts me inside.


probably because i secretly agree but don't want to admit it...

4:52 PM  
Anonymous catherine said...

yep, i totally agree with you Rusty about Weezer. i've been a huge fan of them since i was about 12, but gosh that new album really disappointed me.

5:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I must say that pumkin lattes are gross but pumkin ice cream makes it all better....

5:50 PM  
Blogger Iskwew said...

i want to be a band-aid

7:04 PM  
Anonymous Felibeli said...

The taste of pumpkin will never pass my mouth... there is this old guyanese wives' tale that states:
Twin children should not eat pumpkin or they will not be able to "see far".
My mom never let me eat pumkin as a kid and Im not about to test fate by eating pumpkin... even though I already have horible vision...

8:14 PM  
Anonymous Ashley said...

hey!! awesome show last night. Im a part of that insanely amazing trio of girls who weirdly asked you about taping "momentum is awesome" and then dropped the camera. alls well though and thanks a billion, u know we've loved u all since forever...which is more or less when your first cd came out. anyway, we're gonna try our very hardest to come out to the show on the 20th, and thanks again for being such sweeties. lol, little known fact, when we were coming back to see if you all were back out we were running b/c we had to go, and i very embarrasingly tripped in the parking lot and i think thats y the lady had the guy go get damian b/c i was showing her my battlewounds...hey it worked. thanks and keep on doing wat ur doing

8:34 PM  
Blogger MadMeer said...

True, the new Weezer album stinks like the rotten pumpkin on my porch, but you can't bash a band that has an entire video of them rolling around in fields with cute baby monkeys, lions and bears (seriously- Island in the Sun v.1). I just want to hug them and tell them "go back to the monkeys, Weezer! The monkeys will bring you back to the realm of likeable music."

8:36 PM  
Blogger marina said...

http://www.delocator.net/index.php

while on tour you guys should check out some local flavor of coffee/pumpkin spice/disappointment/stuff. :)

9:04 PM  
Blogger a televised war said...

Personally, I enjoy to sip vanilla frapaccinos while I thumb through their collections of music...which desperatly needs to be spiced up with some okgo. Along with the pumpkin flavoring!

9:08 PM  
Anonymous PSL said...

i'm working at starbucks:)
i recommend you to add a little bit chai syrup with pumpkin spice latte. it will be more spicy and yammy!

11:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

true, the new weezer album is not their best, though i gotta say i did still enjoy it. but in their defense, their shows this year have been completely incredible, and kicked all their old shows' asses!

11:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Billy Corgan, Smashing Pumpkins."
"Homer Simpson, smiling politely."
hahaha, gotta love the simpsons...i can't think of billy corgan or the smashing pumpkins without replaying that scene in my head.

11:48 PM  
Blogger Katy* said...

Okay, you guys officially have an assignment from me: check out the Haymarket cafe when you get here to Northampton. I've only been once or twice, but it's rather good stuff and all my coffee-addict friends go there. It'd be uber-cool to see you guys at Haymarket.

Or you could just go to the Starbucks down the street, too. Or the Java Net cafe. Or the Smith cafe, but I don't reccommend the Smith College coffee...then again, it is the same stuff as Starbucks...

Okay, let's change the assignment: y'all have to get a cup of coffee somewhere in NoHo when you get here. I will be asking you about this on Friday at the show. ;)

1:04 AM  
Anonymous dana said...

I agree with the Starbucks comment. Their pumpkin spice whatever it's called isn't as good as people make it out to be. Neither is Starbucks in general. But whatever.

As well as the comment about Weezer. What happened to good songs like "In the Garage" and "Only in Dreams" and "Say It Ain't So"? At least I still have my OK Go, and that's more than enough for me.

12:25 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i need some pumpkin product now- preferably a pie...

1:54 PM  
Anonymous Kay said...

OK Go has weaned me off of Weezer following the great debacle that was Make Believe. I mean, Freak Me Out? Gross. So thanks, Rusty.

5:01 PM  
Anonymous doublejoe7 said...

i don't mind the pumpkin spice latte, but the gingerbread latte has got to go!

5:12 PM  
Blogger Julia said...

When you're in Canada or in Western New York and it's Fall, try the pumpkin spice doughnut from Tim Horton's. I wouldn't say it's the best of the pumpkin-flavored eats out there, but it's not bad.

7:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What's with the dig to Weezer?? I love you both!

3:10 PM  
Blogger Rabblerouser said...

Sucktastic is my new favorite word. Great concert at the Beacon the other night btw. It was definitely not sucktastic.

2:59 PM  
Blogger i have 12 fingers said...

indeed..

sucktastic
suk·tas·tic adj.


1. Expressing or marked by sucking totally.
2. Given to making remarks or performing actions that suck.

1:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

When in Iowa City try the pumpkin and cinnamon ice creams at Whitey's. The "cup o joe espresso" is also amazing.

3:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

rusty, my friend who works at starbucks just informed me that you can get extra pumps of pumpkin-spice in the lattes if you so wish. i don't know if that would make it any better or not... but it may be worth a shot :)

8:05 PM  
Blogger c luv said...

I'm cornfused. Being very much Italian, I find it very confusing that ravioli are referred to as "pumpkiny." "Tomatoy" or "cheesy" yes, but "pumpkiny"? Is there some sort of weird ravioli out there that I don't know about?

1:06 PM  

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